You have some good points, mainly at trying not to make the men feel controlled, nagged, and emasculated. However, there’s a saying that in relationships women tend to take on the mothering role (nurturing) and men take on the child role (immature and wanting to be nurtured). And, I don’t think it’s fair to allow husbands do whatever they want, whenever they want, and we can never ask for fear of emasculating them. It’s out of consideration and respect for your partner, despite your gender. Just a thought.